I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
