Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize