He asked to "fluff my boner.."
babies were throwing up all over the place
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
