if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
