Soap is not a condiment
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Randomize
