I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
