TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize