i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
