The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
