If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
