4 words: hood of his car
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
