the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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