It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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