WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
