I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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