your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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