Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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