I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
