He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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