it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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