whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
