Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
