so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
My bed smells like the plague
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
