people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
