I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
