Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
