i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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