just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
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Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
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Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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