Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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