i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
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the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
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not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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