Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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