he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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