I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
