My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
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