do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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