all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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