In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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