is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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