Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
You are the jesus of drinking
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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