I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
