Swine flu. Run for my life!
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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