would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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