At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
