i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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