ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I just forgot I was standing up.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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