I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
