How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
