I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Randomize
