There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize
