If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize